Monday, August 23, 2010

Sad. Keli.Thankful.and Playing.

Today was a long was a SAD day. We spent it with my favorite girl, Sonya...and "Shae Jade's" favorite girl, Liv. The four of us have spent lots of days together. Lots of good, easy days. But today, we spent a long, hard one- because it hasn't been just "us 4" in a long time- since this day...

...when little Baney Bane came along...

...and we miss him.

Even though "us 4" is good...we loved having that little man in the mix. Like on this day...

...when these three kiddos tasted their first real snow...and lots of it!

Or this day...

... when we all loaded up and went to The Piney...

...or this day when we celebrated Sonya's birthday together, just "us 5"...

...or on one of the many, many nights that these three found themselves playing in the same bath water.

So today, we missed Bane. Some days I feel really strong. I feel so close to the REALITY that God has such great things that will come of this pain. That joy will come again for Sonya and Dra. But today, honestly, wasn't one of those days. I felt helpless as I sat with Sonya and just cried again this afternoon. I felt weak as I couldn't even take any of her burden from her. This precious family who so many have grown to love are hurting tonight. Please, please, please keep praying. Please God, don't let us settle back into our every day lives and forget to PRAY for them.

"If thou shouldst never see my face again, pray for my soul. More things are wrought by prayer than this world ever dreams. Wherefore, let thy voice rise like a fountain for me, night and day..." ~Alfred Lord Tennyson, Morte D'Arthur

So at the end of today as I drove home with a heavy heart, I called my friend, KELI,(who is one of Sonya's oldest and dearest friends in the world) knowing that her deep love for Sonya would allow her to help me carry this sadness today. She did. She listened and, as always, had the perfect words. She should be famous for how well words flow through her. Gift from God, for sure. (And might I request here, that if you are ever famous, KELI, you'd remember this shout out??? :)) So after 45 minutes of our kids screaming in our ears and climbing all over us- refusing to let another minute of their mommy's love on anyone but them, we were forced to hang up... but I felt better...and needed more... so I went HERE for more of her words. Trust me, people, you're gonna want to follow her blog. Inspiring. Rich actually calls her The Wordsmith. Anyways, her blog today inspired me to rise out of my sadness and start counting.

So here it goes. Today, on a day when my heart is heavy...I still have so much to be THANKFUL for!!!
1)I am so THANKFUL for Jesus Christ, who overcame DEATH.
2)I am so THANKFUL for Sonya and Livi today- two girls that God gave to me enjoy the best of life with, and share the burden of hard times with...and for Drason who is so strong and loves these precious girls so perfectly, even now.
3) So THANKFUL for my baby girl. Oh what a joy she has been!
4) So THANKFUL that I am married to the kindest man on earth, who has been a testament of God's faithfulness and and inspiration to be better since the day I met him.
5) So THANKFUL for a very tight-knit family who loves deep as the ocean...
6) So THANKFUL for the beautiful sunshine today that shone bright as ever and reminded me that light always overcomes darkness. Even today.
7) So THANKFUL for so many wonderful friends whose encouragement hasn't stopped coming at the most needed moments.
8) So THANKFUL for the WORD OF GOD that I can rest peacefully in on the good days and stand firmly on today because "...we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love Him, who have been called according to his purpose..." -(Romans 8:28)

And, KELI, of course, is another gift to Sonya, for "such a time as this" the mouth behind the perfect words on Bane's blog, too...which further inspired me today...

...So tomorrow...tomorrow is another day. And after a day like today, I have resolved to get busy PLAYING again, in honor of Baby Bane. I just texted Sonya and asked her to join me tomorrow as we let God lead us to people who need us. Nothing heals a hurting heart like serving others! I have been so inspired by Sonya's strength and her desire to let Bane's legacy be one of good...and so tomorrow, I am gonna PLAY IT FORWARD. If you don't know Sonya or Drason personally, you can't imagine the strength they, too, are drawing as more and more people come forward with stories of how their lives have been changed by the loss of their son. If you are trying to find away to love on this family and have wondered "what could I possibly do to comfort them?"--- let me tell you that the very best way is to get engaged in letting Bane's story inspire you to change your world, with kindness...and then make sure you TELL THEM about it, on Bane's blog. They read it every day, I promise. Follow the button on the right side of this blog to PLAY IT FORWARD yourself, and then find a way, yourself, to tell as many people as you can to do the same.

"No act of kindness, however small, is ever wasted." ~Aesop


  1. Dana, it was so good seeing you yesterday and I was so hoping it would continue on as a "better day". I pray today is.

    By the way, I know Sonya is THANKFUL, THANKFUL for YOU...especially at this time. Love you:) b

  2. After reading this, I had to send it onto others via fb. I hope you don't mind. We are constantly lifting them up in prayer and you as well. You are dearly loved, girl. Sonya said last night how great it has been to have her sister with her everyday. I am thankful for you and all you do. As it says in Galations 6:2 NIV "Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."

  3. you: i love.

    and i say thank you, because when Dana says something it really must be true. and these words, in this post, were a gift to me on a hard day.

    here's to dialing your number in the hard days ahead. much love to you, beautiful girl.