Friday, February 19, 2010

28 Candles Blessings

It will be my birthday again in a little less than 3 hours. My birthday for the 28th time in my life. Of all of the days I have spent upon this earth, 28 of them have been some of my favorites...because I love my birthdays! I love that there is one day of each year that my most favorite people sort of "celebrate me"...no matter where they are, or what they are doing, they stop and make a special point to think of me, to sing to me on my voicemail, to bring me a gift...to make me feel so special. I love it because I do feel so loved and so special on this day. Tomorrow is that day again...and it has actually started already. Tonight I went to the mailbox and was so surprised to find several cards with my name on them... and even a gift! Among them, an "anonymous" envelope, strangely resembling my Mother's handwriting. :) As I hurriedly turned it over to rip it open...


Bummer. This could be a very long 3 hours because I know that on February 20th (at 12 am up and down) :), I will open this letter and, regardless of what is inside, I will get that sweet, familiar feeling of being loved on my birthday all over again. From my Mom. She has made all 28 so special.

And oddly enough, I must say that this birthday is sort of a milestone for me, kind of like I imagine 30 or 40 may be. See, 28 is the youngest I ever remember my Mom being. I actually remember telling someone, when I was five years old, "My mom is 28!!!"...and I was proud that I knew that fact, I guess that's why I remember it. So it is so strange now, to be turning the age that I remember my Mom being. I don't feel "old" enough to be my Mom's age, no matter what number it may be, but this is the first one that I actually remember her being. It seemed like she was so old then, when I was 5, and she was 28. It seemed like eons separated us. Now, it doesn't seem like there is much time at all between she and I. As I get older and older, she seems to get younger and younger... I guess because I "get" her more and more. I have become her in so many ways besides the number of years I have lived. I was talking to my precious friend, Diane, last night about how those generational distances seem to fade away somewhere in your mid-twenties...and what a blessing when your Mom becomes your friend. We are "there", me and my Mom. I'd rather spend a day with her than just about anyone. And today, as an early birthday gift from God, I think, I got to do just that. And it is even better, now, because there is another "us"... another daughter...Shaelyn Jade. We are 3 peas in a pod! :) Crazy that I am the mother, now...and I will be the one who seems so old...even though I am so young! :)
We spent a long time talking about birthdays and aging today. With each passing year, I understand better that if the next ten years go by as fast as the last 10 have, I won't turn around twice before my kids are grown up, and I am, again, my Mom's age. 60 or 70 doesn't seem so old, now...but rather, fast. Fast approaching. Quickly reached. Mom and I agreed that growing old, no matter which number you arrive at, is a state of mind... an attitude. It is a determination of the mind that keeps us young rather than a transformation of the body that makes us old.


A wonderful Greek proverb says, "The heart that loves is always young", which may explain why I feel so young :)...but then I heard a quote recently: "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away", and if this is true, I might as well be 100! My life is so jam packed full of joys each day.

So this year, I don't think my candles will represent years. Even though there will be 28 standing (proudly) atop my cake, I think I'll count all the blessings that God has given me in these 28 years. Two of the greatest being my Mom, who is finally SO young :) (you're welcome, Mom)...and my daughter, who will be 28 before I know it!

"Praise God from whom all blessings flow!"

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